


Night Changes

by queenswriting



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Cheating, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-31
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-03-04 10:16:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3064136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenswriting/pseuds/queenswriting
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis realizes too late that he may have lost a great deal of what made him happy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Night Changes

  
It was during the You and I shoot that Louis realized it, and it sort of shook him down to his very core. The way that Harry spoke to Ben Winston and the way that Harry touched Ben Winston; was oddly reminiscent of how he had spoken and touched Louis when they were still working their way through the X Factor. It was obvious and not even he could deny it any longer, seeing the love that flooded through Harry when he was around the older man.

  
He remembered the shaking gasp that left him, an assistant thinking that the cold weather was affecting him and getting him a hot bag to hold to him. He held it, because it was the only thing that was keeping him from falling apart on the shoot.

  
Harry and Louis had dated since they had successfully lost the X Factor and actually were notified that they would probably become one of the biggest stars. They had been happy, in love, and it seemed as though they were an unstoppable force as far as relationships go. Louis had lived in that for the last year, even when it got really hard for him to pretend that he was alright.

  
Despite often feeling that he was on top of the world, sometimes he sunk down into a depression that he couldn’t quite shake. Although it wasn’t a public thing, Louis was bipolar. It was kept very quiet and as long as he stayed on his medication, everything would be fine in the public’s eye. He stayed on the medication mainly due to preferring the person he was on that medication.

  
After finding out what Harry was up to, Louis spent a lot of time on an emotional roller coaster. He never brought it up to his boyfriend though, letting him continue on with life as Louis tried to figure it all out for himself.

 

Louis was sitting beside Zayn between shooting for something new that they were selling, Louis could never quite keep up with all of their merch. Ben was talking loudly as he tried to get Liam and Harry to move particular ways. Frowning, Louis watched as Ben put his hands on Harry’s hips and situated him right where he wanted him.

  
“How long has that been going on?” Louis sighed. He turned his attention to his best friend, who was looking a little bit shocked. Either because Louis knew or because they weren’t even being subtle about it.  
“It started with Nick and Harry, but I guess they broke up. And then Harry started seeing Ben.” Zayn admitted.

  
Swallowing the lump in his throat, Louis just numbly nodded his head. Obviously he knew about Ben, but he hadn’t known about Nick. Although now that he thought about it, his dislike of him had probably stemmed from knowing deep down. He pushed his fingers through his hair. “Why didn’t you guys say anything to me?”

  
“We didn’t really know how to tell you what was going on. And you’ve been down a lot more than you’ve been up. Harry’s the one that should tell you.”

  
“I don’t know what I’m going to do.” Louis admitted. Everything in his mind had sort of built up to the eventual life that he was going to have with Harry. He was slowly coming to the conclusion that there would be no time when the two of them were out together, that there would be no shared home, and that there would be no adopted children.

  
“As much as I love you both, I think you should leave him,” Zayn said, honestly. Those words didn’t surprise him, but the truth hurt a bit. But it was hurt from the betrayal that Harry had given him and not what his friend said. He knew it was the only thing he could do, and he would do it that night.

  
That was all that he could do.

  
“Things are going to get really weird when I break up with him, you know. I don’t want any of you feeling like you have to pick sides. This is between me and him. I won’t hate any of you if you decide to remain friends with him. I just don’t want you guys to expect for it to be at all normal, it’s never going to be like how it used to.” Louis sighed. He got up when Liam and Harry were motioned to sit back down; Niall, Louis, and Zayn standing in front of the camera.

 

Louis let Harry know that he had something he needed to talk to him about. To come over to his hotel room around 7 at night and they’d have dinner together. He’d ordered Chinese, because it was something that they could both agree on and it was usually best to not let Louis cook food. Even if he did have the slight desire to poison the male that had hurt him so badly.

Despite Harry seeming to understand that this dinner was important, he was still an hour late. Louis tried not to think about who he was with during that hour, but he couldn’t help it. He was near tears as he sat at the table, at least the food would be easy to microwave when Harry came back. If Harry got the chance to eat dinner with him.

“Sorry I’m late, had to finish up looking over some shots with Ben.” Harry said loudly, making a big show of putting his jacket and scarf away, a bright smile on his face.  He was trying too hard and now that Louis was aware of what was going on, he could see it. There were many things that he could have said, but none of them were kind enough.

“It’s alright. Sit down, the food is a little cold and stuff.” Louis said awkwardly. He didn’t know how to do this.

“Thanks, babe.” Harry said, picking up his bowl of soup and then sat down across from him. Breathing in deeply, Louis rubbed the back of his neck and gave him a small smile. His stomach curled and for a moment he thought that he would be sick.

“Just… I didn’t want to do this but I can’t just… I can’t live like this.” Louis whispered. Harry’s face fell but he still placed the soup into his mouth.

“What are you talking about?” Harry questioned after he had finished swallowing the food.

“It’s taken me a freakishly long time to understand what was going on. I think because I was just so willing to let this go, because of how much I love you. And you’re a solid part of my life, and I needed you in it. But I don’t need someone that’s going to cheat on me, and make me question my own self-worth.” Louis whispered. “I know you’re sleeping with Ben and I know that you used to sleep with Nick.”

Harry placed the spoon down and carded his fingers through his long hair, taking in a deep breath. “I honestly didn’t think you cared. You never said anything, I just figured you were letting it go on. I didn’t think that you just didn’t know.”

“You really thought that I would be okay with you cheating on me and running around with someone that I have to see frequently?” Louis asked, a bit of annoyance coming into his voice. He wasn’t handling it well, that much was pretty obvious. It didn’t help that he was going through the motion of depression to manic.

“I hoped you would be. I love you both, I love you and I love him. Don’t… I hope you don’t think that I don’t love you. Because I do, a great deal.” Harry murmured.

“That’s not how it works, Harry. You can’t just fuck two people at the same time and assume that they’re both going to be okay with it. You can’t fuck your boyfriend of four years and think that he’s just going to be okay with it. While you’re fucking the director of our videos and falling in love with him.” Louis murmured. He was having a hard time keeping it all together. He was falling apart and Harry seemed to have a vague understanding of this.

“We both know we’re having this discussion because you’re breaking up with me.” Harry snapped. He was gripping the spoon a little bit tightly as he started to push food into his mouth. He wanted to finish eating before he got the hell out of the building.

“Yes, I am. I’m breaking up with you. I am so, completely done with this relationship and the shit that you are dragging me into. I am so over being alone. I am so over being by myself. I am so done with feeling like I’m shit.” Louis voice got higher pitched and more upset at the end of the sentence.

He was so alone, and there was nothing he could do about it now.

“Louis, you need to calm down a little bit. You’re getting loud.” Harry said. His voice was ever so condescending as he stood up and grabbed the plastic bowl of soup that was in his hand. This only pissed Louis off even further.

“You’ve ruined it! You broke my heart and you made me think that everything was alright. You should have told me that you were falling in love with someone else. You should have told me the truth instead of just… Making me think that there was something else going on. I thought things were fine, and I let myself think that this is what it was meant to feel like when you are in love. But this is wrong, you were wrong to do this. I may love you, but I don’t even remotely like you right now.” Louis said, slowly gaining control of his voice. His emotional outburst was honest, but he knew Harry had a talent for going towards the nerves when he was angry.

There was nothing left to say, the two of them staring each other in the eyes. It left Louis with an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

They looked at each other as strangers, and no longer as lovers.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading I don't have a beta so I apologize for any grammatical mistakes.


End file.
